Los Zero Boys

The Zero Boys is a good, old fashioned 80's action/horror/comedy. It's also rare. I just found this one on DVD (if you believe that) and it's marketed as an action movie; the trailer, the cover art, everything. It does start out that way. The Zero Boys, Steve, Larry, and Rip, are the best at what they do: paintball wars. The movie starts with a great game of paintball. When the Zero Boys win, they take a vacation in the woods and stumble upon an abandoned cabin. That's when the horror starts. The action part is so good that I almost didn't want it to turn into a horror flick. It all works out though because the horror is just as good, and cheesy, as the action. It's actually turns into a decent slasher flick which creates an eerie atmosphere. The cheesy dialogue and the one liners are what really make the movie. Such phrases as "Jason old boy, are you in there?" and "Probably just a bunch of faggots living in the woods." make this one a classic. All through the movie I kept remarking about how much the lead killer looked like Martin Sheen. It turned out to be his brother, Joe Estevez. If you're looking for an entertaining mix of genres, catch The Zero Boys, if you can find it.

The title characters are three young men - Steve (Daniel Hirsch), Larry (Tom Shell), and Rip (Jared Moses) - who are veterans of weekend war games. They head out with three female companions - Jamie (Kelli Maroney), Sue (Nicole Rio), and Trish (Crystal Carson) - into the woods to have a good time. They come across an isolated dwelling, and decide to make themselves at home. They do this at their own peril, for the house owner and an associate are evil sadists and not exactly hospitable.

Some genre buffs cite this as a forerunner to more modern "torture porn" features like the "Saw" and "Hostel" series, except that it's a lot less explicit in terms of onscreen human suffering. Overall, it's a mildly entertaining thriller, with tones of a slasher at times but which also takes its cue from survival films like "Deliverance". It might not be gory or sexy enough to suit some tastes, but the story is pretty simple and straightforward, and the pacing is more than adequate. The characters, especially Rip, threaten to be overly annoying at first, but become easier to root for as the story progresses. Filmed on the same basic locations as "Friday the 13th Part III", this can boast an early credit for future big time composer Hans Zimmer ("Inception", "The Dark Knight"). Atmosphere is decent, and while the script is often predictable, it does elicit some chuckles from this viewer when it plays out just as he thought it would.

The acting is negligible, although to be fair the actors have to mouth a fair amount of inane dialogue. Maroney is the most recognizable of the young cast; viewers familiar with this cute, appealing actress from "Night of the Comet" and "Chopping Mall" will be amused when she's presented with a gun and tells Steve that she doesn't know how to use one. The audience will be struck by the resemblance of the primary antagonist to actor Martin Sheen (you get an ever so slight echo of "Apocalypse Now" here), so it comes as no surprise that the actor in question is Joe Estevez, Martins' brother! (Acting under a pseudonym.)

Running a reasonably trim hour and a half, this is watchable enough to not feel like a waste of time.

Six out of 10.

Wrong Turn is definitely a ripoff the general idea in this movie, only that movie is a serious horror film and this one is more of the standard B- horror with a twist of humorous adventure. It's labeled a horror film, which by all comparable standards to 80s horror films it is, but you're not entirely sure where the movie is going in the first 15 minutes. The box art and opening sequence both set this up to be more of a light weight version of Deliverence mixed with some B- soldier heavy artillary jungle warfare. What you actually get is a paint ball battle in a deserted town, followed by a random weekend in the woods that goes awry. For the first 30 minutes, nothing particularly horrific happens, then the rest of the movie is a lot of running through the woods survival. It's blatantly obvious by both the cast and the box art that this film is total B- territory and I obviously only recommend it for fans of these films. I just wish that the energy from the opening sequence was carried through the entire film. There's some definite cult status here, but the second half of the film strays too far into cliché horror territory that you forget the initial premise from the opening. Unfortunately there is also NO ending to this film.

Aside from the short-comings, I have a lot of respect for Nico Mastorakis as a director, writer and producer. He's one of the rare few that doesn't conform to the BS that is Hollywood. I'm also glad that there are some great featurettes on his DVDs on the making of his movies including his commentary as well.

The Zero Boys movie review

The zero boys is a 1986 action comedy horror directed by Nico Mastorakis, staring daniel hirsch as steve and Kelli Maroney as jamie. The Zero boys was a great surprise for me I turned it on for back ground noise and from moment one i was hooked, i couldn't take my eyes off the screen .the movie can be brokeen down into two halfs; first half is a teen comedy, but then at around the forty minute mark it turns into a full blown slasher flic with genuine creepy moment. the first half is a little dull but is helped a long by the comedy relief (RIP and larry played by Jared Moses and Tom Shell respectivly) the acting in the first part of the movie is average at best but Kelli Maroney is a shining light during the latter half so the acting is improved tenfold. the eighties craziness begins with the maniacs laying siege on the group. the special effects are top notch in my opinion. everything you want from a slasher flick. I was also pleasantly surprise when I found out one of the maniacs is played by martin sheens younger brother Joe Estevez who is definitely an asset to the movie. the ending is a heart thumping ride that ends so right but yet so wrong..... all in all i would consider The Zero Boys a hidden gem of a movie and would highly recommend for any fan of 80s horror or action for that matter and for that i will give The Zero boys Four skulls out of five 💀💀💀💀

About six months ago I copied a bunch of movies I've been meaning to watch onto my laptop in hopes that while on a trip, or over my mom's doing laundry, I would find the time and effort to watch them. A few of them I have watched, but largely this group of 6 or 7 films has gone untouched. Today I finally got the will to watch a film called The Zero Boys.

I had download.. erhm, I mean rented it about 4 or 5 months ago after I re-watched the 80's Dawn of the Dead inspired slasher-flick: Chopping Mall. While browsing the IMDb, I noticed that cult actress and Night of the Comet alum Kelli Maroney was in a film described as an "action / slasher / horror" film. I had to see this.

After watching the film and while doing my dishes, I was trying to concoct a clever and hip metaphor for this film: "it's what a teen slasher film would be like if Polanski directed it." No, Polanski would make it more confusing. "It's like a Golan-Globus produced slasher film." Maybe, but a film produced by those great Greek gods of Chuck Norris would've put more than only one explosion in it, and surely there'd be boobies. As I continued these ridiculous metaphors in my head, the more I realized that as much as The Zero Boys failed as a film, it was strikingly entertaining.

The film opens during a "weekend warrior" game between two groups of college-aged kids. The clever director of this film, Nico Mastorakis, has cut this opening scene with such disguise -- it FEELS as though something quite real is going on here, but we soon realize it's just a game of paint ball (and a dull one at that). This is where we are introduced to our main character: Steve. Steve is a strong, leader type pretty boy with a patented 80s haircut. His two friends Rip and Larry are apparently the kings of paint ball, as they have just defeated some kid in a Nazi uniform.

The plot really thickens up when we learn that the Nazi kid has wagered his own girlfriend on his paint ball skills. Not only has Steve won $20, he has now earned the right to court the buxom, catty, blond Jamie (played by the aforementioned Kelli Marony).

Soon the group are somehow on a picnic in the woods, and sooner then you can say "Sam Raimi," they've found a creepy looking deserted cabin. For one reason or another, the group decides to stay here even though strange things continue to happen during their stay.

What follows is for the most part standard slasher fare. Lots of POV shots looking at the cabin from outside, lots of screaming. One thing that was completely out of the ordinary was the order in which characters were killed. As a standard: characters having sex in slasher films are usually offed during, or quickly after the act of coitus (or as Rip says: "coitus interuptus"). When watching this film, I was pleasantly surprised at the level of non-conformity when it came to typical slasher style.

The film doesn't quite deliver on it's interesting middle section. Even the subtle references to Argento's Suspiria can't quite save it. When it comes down to it, the best film to compare this to would have to be Wes Craven's The Hills Have Eyes. For one thing: the villains in that film are never really explained. They live in the desert, they inbreed, they eat humans. These things we can take for granted, we can understand this because of how these characters look and talk; they're complete freaks. In a slight contrast, we never really see too much of the villains in this film. Not until the end, and I was quite confused by the costume designer's choice. One of the killers in the film is wearing a sweater and polo shirt. And quite strangely, once we see his face, he looks, somewhat normal. It's not clear why the director never introduces or develops the villains, not that it was needed, but in light of their strange weapon choices and dressing styles, I would've been interested.

The Zero Boys isn't a typical 80's teen horror film, and for that it's a relatively fun, yet somewhat dull film. Recommended viewing with: Night of the Comet, The Hills Have Eyes, Friday the 13th Part III, Chopping Mall.