The Vineyard

Famous winemaker Dr Po invites some young actors to his exclusive vineyard to audition for a film but in fact he is after their blood. Dr Po is actually a mad scientist with occult powers who is obsessed with immortality, for which he needs young blood. Throw in some zombies, martial arts, sex/nudity, dudes in tight tops with bulging biceps, a bit of gore, 80's fashions and music , this is quite a melting pot. Although it did get a limited theatrical release this movie is very typical of the straight to home video kind. I have the UK VHS which has a scary looking old hag on the cover, quite enticing though sadly her part is quite minor. The acting and script are far from Oscar worthy and the film is more fun than it is good but for me this is far more preferable than the majority of modern digitally shot CGI enhanced horror that is churned out these days.

Dr. Elson Po (James Hong) is one of the world's most famous wine growers. He has a magic potion which has kept him handsome and alive during the centuries. However, lately the magic which rejuvenates him seem to be less and less effective.

This film was written by, directed by and starring James Hong. So if you are a Hong fan, this is the picture for you -- he brings an angle to horror that I certainly have not seen elsewhere. I am not sure if you can call him Chinese-American, since he was born in the United States, but he has made an American film with Chinese roots -- possibly a unique feat in American horror.

Some of this was pure 1980s. Hong's dance in the mask at his 1980s party was pretty weird, and the music certainly amplified the weirdness. The special effects range from good to bad. I liked the masks and makeup, but some of the "electricity" just looked terrible.

James Hong is great as always, very sinister and gets to play the wizard with naked hotties in this movie. The Vineyard (bland title) is definitely inspired by Lo Lieh's upchuck classics Black Magic 1 & 2. It just doesn't pull out the stops like those Hong Kong classics or create a twisted reality. The actresses are all lookers and that is a major plus but not enough to make repeated viewing.

I didn't think much of this back in '89, but now the film serves as a fond reminder of a time when horror films didn't have to make much sense just so long as there were hot women in various states of undress, and lots of hokey special makeup effects with a touch of gore. The Vineyard offers plenty of those, as well as a hilariously bad party scene, spider vomiting, some questionable '80s fashion (including that classic male ensemble, cropped vest and three quarter length sweat pants), incredibly big spectacles (as sported by Hong Kong star Michael Wong), a nifty decapitation, James Hong hamming it up, and zombies. In short, it's as cheesy as hell and quite a lot of fun for it.

Hong, who also co-directs, plays wine producer Dr. Elson Po, who poses as a film producer to lure young victims to his island, where he uses their blood to create a potion that prolongs his life. Without this precious elixir, he quickly reverts to an aged state. His latest group of unsuspecting visitors consists of several very fit beauties, a couple of jocks, and journalist Jeremy (Wong), who is writing an article about Po. What follows is incredibly dumb, but rather enjoyable nonsense, that, like a fine wine, has improved with age.

6.5 out of 10, rounded up to 7 for all the big-haired babes.

My Gooooood! I'm just tired to repeat this eternal question: Why was this movie ever made? This is worse than Troll 2, worse than Witchery and Crawlers, it sucks. All the characters and "actors" (they're unique, they have done only this feature)are involved in this story only because they will be victims. This movie just hurts. Zombie make up is cheap and acting and script are hopeless... Total failure!