Recensioni di Droid_Gunner

I checked this out because I wanted to see Jet Li and Jerry Trimble go at it. And for the first hour of the movie, I was disappointed with a slow-moving, mediocre action film. But, man, was I in for a treat that last half hour or so - specifically the final fight scene (where Li and Trimble REALLY square off) which delivered all the goods I was expecting, and then more. Viewed on one of the old "Jet Li Collection" DVDs that Dimension released in the early 2000s, so poor video quality and an awful dub were expected and didn't detract from, what turned out to be, an overall above average martial-arts films, solidified by the engaging final act and a powerhouse fight scene.

Also, Trimble's mullet must be noted. That thing was mighty.

Completely by the book Lifetime formula, but still enjoyable. The performances were all-around solid, particularly the unhinged antagonist who pulled off the routine psycho performance in a charming way. A couple twists tossed in kept the pace moving quickly and elevated it over the usual Lifetime films. Worth checking out if you're into the genre.

This will not be a very thorough review at all. I'll simply say the movie is fun and passably entertaining, though nothing you haven't already seen in a Lifetime movie before. However, there is one thing I bet you've never seen in one of these movies...

The main character has a Gizmo keychain. Yes, Gizmo. The mogwai. The cute little dude from Gremlins. At first I thought I was seeing things, but no. It's clearly seen in a moment when the main character races into her garage to grab her car keys hanging on the wall. I had rewind and pause on my DVR, but it's 'ol Giz for sure. Why on earth in the year 2021 would they choose to do this, I have no idea, but for better or worse, it made the movie, well, unique.

"Delivers," get it?

If you're into these Lifetime thrillers, this one is worth watching. The snappy pace and solid performances keep the suspense going pretty much from the first minute. The motivation behind the main antagonist is absolutely loony, but hey, why not. The protagonist is likable and helps ground the movie -- even in the third act when things really get nuts.

While the movie is the furthest thing from realistic, having a baby in jeopardy like this is sure to give suspense to any parent. And for better or worse, that might have been what made the movie work for my wife and I.

Worth watching.

Perhaps the greatest line ever uttered in cinema, when the pompous professor played by Randy Wayne eyes the young lead actress's outfit and smarms, "Nice outfit. What do you call it... Frumpy tracksuit?"

This movie is a mess. Things don't add up. Characters emotions change on a dime. The stock footage shot of the college campus is used DOZENS of times as a bandaid to cover up story / editing issues. The blame should all fall on the shoulders of a poor script and awkward narrative. Now that that's out of the way, let's discuss Randy Wayne...

I've seen this guy a few times over the years. Pretty sure I remember him from that straight-to-video 'Dukes of Hazzard' sequel in the mid-2000s. Never thought much of him, until this film. Wow. He hams it up like crazy. Every word out of his mouth is uber-smarmy (like the above "frumpy" line), creating a performance that is both embarrassing but fun. I don't feel bad saying this, because I'm 99% sure he was in on it and just crafted the cheesiest performance possible.

And for that alone, the movie was worth watching.

(I was laughing SO HARD at the delivery of the "frumpy tracksuit" line, but I just about fell off my couch when a character later recalled and REPEATED that same line back -- "What was it he said about your outfit... Frumpy tracksuit?" Guess the filmmakers loved that line so much they had to double-dip!)

2009 may possibly represent the last year Seagal made a watchable, coherent film. At least one that he was the star of, since most of his recent work is nothing more than glorified cameos where they plaster his goatee'd face on the poster. "The Keeper" from that same year was also quite enjoyable, so it's a toss-up between these two.

"A Dangerous Man" starts with a bang and, aside for some lulls in the second act, moves at a quick pace. Despite still using body-doubles and not doing his own ADR, Seagal actually seems to be trying on this one. A lot of his speeches are clearly him just making up lines. They're cheesy, but effective. Extra points for the ending with Byron Mann, which features a decent fight scene and a fun "walkin' away from an explosion" moment.

A fun one.

A decent enough episode with Steven Williams in a solid guest starring role, but I can't help but feel this episode didn't live up to its premise. The whole set-up involves a UFO and a government cover-up -- C'mon, couldn't we just go all-out on that and have there be aliens? Because as it stands now, they really don't even pay off the UFO premise.

I want to see Reno kick an alien in his face!

This is nothing more than typical Lifetime fare with a larger budget and a name cast -- and that's not a bad thing. There's very few surprises in store for the audience here, but all the elements of a solid thriller are present with some unique twists and turns. What makes this film fun is seeing how deep both the protagonist and antagonist become intwined in each other's lives, and watching the screw get twisted tighter and tighter as the film goes.

Teamed with the writer / director combo behind the surprisingly solid "The Intruder" from 2019, Swank turns in a great psycho performance and elevates this above the usual thriller fare (though "The Intruder" is a better film than this). She really cranks it up at the end, and even though it gets a bit ridiculous (and nonsensical) at the conclusion, it's still a good time.

I recommend checking out the alternate ending on the DVD. I found it a lot creepier and more fun than the theatrical ending.

Sorry to steal their line, but another reviewer hit the nail on the head -- the most redeeming factor of this one was the "double twist" at the end.

It's a "sorority" Lifetime movie, so you know what you're getting (not necessarily a bad thing), and a "see it coming from a mile away" ending is just part of the deal. However, this one did a good job at twisting the screw one extra time at the end in a way I never saw coming. For that, plus decent performances and nice cinematography, it's worth a watch.

Also worth noting, the bizarre and way out of place "nightmare" sequence that was straight out of a horror movie. Ineffective and just weird for this type of movie.

Horror has a hard time poking fun at itself, minus outlandish parodies like the 'Scary Movie' franchise (and most of those even suck). 'Freaky' manages to be both a firmly-rooted horror movie as well as a parody, without ever crossing into that "spoof" realm.

Years back, people gushed over 'Cabin in the Woods' being a sophisticated dissection of horror tropes -- but 'Freaky' kicks its butt. Dare I say, this is one of the smartest horror films I've seen in years, and honestly, one of the better comedies in quite a while.

Vince Vaughn knocked it out of the park with his performance as well.

Excellent, fun movie.

Look. I understand Lifetime shows some cheeseball movies -- but this one is really bad. It looks bad. The acting is bad. The story is bad. Everything is just... Bad.

I don't know if COVID affected the production, but it's clear this was not filmed in a real high school. Which is a problem when you're MAKING A MOVIE SET IN A HIGH SCHOOL! (Check out the scene that takes place in the "Principal's office" or the "Public library.")

I hate to come on here with nothing positive to say about a movie, because making movies is just about the hardest thing on Earth next to brain surgery -- but this has nearly no redeeming value. Sorry.

Not a bad movie. I actually enjoyed watching Llamas, playing his usual smarmy ladies man, only this time, he's a scientist searching for Atlantis. He kicks some butt, but not much. He barely has any 'action beats,' so it seemed like he was wasted in this role -- but it was a different type of film for him, so it was worth seeing for fans.

His co-stars tried their best, and while I was genuinely entertained through most of the film, the whole thing is misleading because THE SHARKS DON'T REALLY DO ANYTHING! Sure, they're there (in all their early-2000s CGI glory), but it's not a 'killer shark movie' by any means -- and anyone who say the DVD cover on the shelf at the DVD store back in the day, that's what they expected.

I remember renting this a million years ago on DVD when it first appeared in video stores in '03 -- and while revisiting it was fun, it was unnecessary, as there's far better shark movies out there... With or without Llamas.

Not the worst, but doesn't deliver on its promises.

As odd as it is to say, "Stalked by My Doctor" has become a full-fledged franchise that's now run 5 films. Even odder, I've become a huge fan of them. For this installment, there was a noticeable change in tone -- as illustrated by the title change (I guess "Stalked by my Doctor 5" just didn't seem marketable to Lifetime?).

For this movie, they went a little more serious in tone, took out some of the overly cartoonish moments (like the song and dance scene in part 3 -- which I loved) and even eliminated Laid-Back Beck for most of the film, until the third act. While I do feel the series got a little goofy around part 3, not seeing those elements in the 5th movie made me miss them. There's also elements to this film where it felt they didn't fully execute on the premise -- like Beck living in the attic. It was a neat, creepy concept, but it didn't play much of a factor toward the conclusion.

Overall, a strong entry in the series, but far from the best. See my rankings below:

5. Stalked by My Doctor: A Sleepwalker's Nightmare 4. Just What the Doctor Ordered 3. Stalked by My Doctor: The Return 2. Stalked by My Doctor: Patient's Revenge 1. Stalked by My Doctor.

As stated by a previous reviewer, there is one thing in this movie that stands out. Something that transcends the rest of the film, taking center stage, and DEMANDS the viewer's full and complete attention:

Corin Nemec never stops playing with his glasses.

Never. Literally. It's continuous, in every scene. It never stops. It took my wife and I a couple scenes to notice it, but once we caught it, it became an almost drinking game. He never stops fiddling with them.

He takes them off. He puts them on. Then, back off. Wait, no, on again.

He gestures with them, points with them, folds them and taps them against his chin while thinking intently. Then they're back on. The camera cuts away, cuts back, they're off, only so he can put them back on again. On. Off. On. Is that Tara Reid? What's she doing in this? Gah, now they're off again. Now on!

The guy plays with his glasses more than Horatio Caine.

Otherwise, the movie is nothing more than standard Lifetime material, but does have a couple fun moments from the psycho cheer coach. Catch it if you're bored one night.

Well, meet the dopiest of them all. And that ain't a bad thing.

My oh my, was this silly, ridiculous, borderline idiotic... But it was so darn fun, it can't be considered a waste.

Eric Roberts turns in his usual 'cool guy' persona, but this time with a dash of Schwarzenegger for good measure. He moves around pretty well in the few stunt pieces and shoot-outs they let him perform, though most are done with a poorly- matched stunt/fight-double.

Ice-T is there for a paycheck, but is still fun to watch. Same can be said for Madsen, who clearly shot his scenes in an afternoon. Probably even left his car running when he arrived.

Sam Firstenberg has certainly directed some b-movie action classics. This isn't on the level of 'American Ninja' by any means, but the fights and stunts are well shot for the most part (forgiving some lousy CGI explosions here and there) and the plot moves at such a quick place you can forgive the usual b-movie blemishes of this era.

This is the type of movie you can have on in the background while doing something else, not pay too much attention, and still get something out of it.

Also, the bloopers during the end credits are a lot of fun.

If you go into 'Planet Raptor' expecting nothing more than 'Carnosaur' in space, I can't see how you'll be disappointed. The plot if awful and confusing, and for a movie that shows off it's titular monster in the first 3 minutes of screen time, it moves painfully slow.

The effects in the film are a highlight, for two very different reasons: 1. The CGI is offensivley bad. I'm talking 'Incredible Bulk' levels of lame. So bad, it's funny.

2. The practical puppets used, much like in the 'Carnosaur' flicks, are kinda fun and give off that 90's direct-to-video vibe. Don't know if that was done intentionally (I doubt it), but I enjoyed them.

Overall, the film is goofy, cheesy fun. Not a b-movie classic, but watchable.

I've been on a bit of a Robert Z'Dar kick ever since he sadly passed away (RIP). When I saw this short was available to view on IMDb for free, I knew I couldn't miss it.

I'm not familiar with the creators previous works - although I have heard of the "Cesar and Otto" characters/series(?) - but I still found the short to be goofy, enjoyable fun.

Some jokes landed, others didn't -- but the tone was consistently light and fun. The sound was kind of crummy, transitions were awkward, and lighting clearly wasn't a priority... But all of this is forgivable in the low-budget world, ESPECIALLY we get to see two legendary b-movies actors sharing the screen together and having fun. Z'Dar and Estevez have done SO MANY movies together, but in this one it felt like they were playing themselves (which they were, so I guess that makes sense) and just having a good time riffing off of each other and enjoying the crazy life of a low-budget actor.

To the average viewer, I can't really recommend this -- as many of the jokes are b-movie "inside" references. But if you're a fan of the genre, definitely check it out. It's worth the 15 minutes.

Forgive me if this review is short, but I just finished watching the movie and I hope to have this review written before the credit sequence ends. (What a terrible theme song, by the way.)

'Howling IV', according to the IMDb trivia, is a more faithful depiction of the original novel than the Joe Dante's first 'Howling' film. I don't know whether this is true or not, but either way -- Who cares? Accuracy of the source material does not necessarily mean a better film. And this film isn't even close in quality (or b-movie fun) to the original movie, or even its goofy sequels.

'Howling IV' was incredibly dull and slow moving. And despite the ending picking up the pace with some pretty solid gore and special effects, the final moments of the movie - the "gotcha" moment - was just insulting.

Very little of this movie worked on any level, and even worse, it wasn't so-bad-it's-good like many other films in the 'Howling' series.

Just avoid it.

In my search to catch up on all the PM Entertainment movies that have somehow eluded me over the years, I finally checked out 'Final Impact' today. And I have to say that I enjoyed it.

I was a little disappointed by the lack of action, but genuinely surprised by the amount of drama.

Llamas plays Nick, a former champion kickboxer who can't handle the realities of life after losing to over-the-top bad guy Jake Gerrard, succumbing to alcoholism and depression. Nick finds a way to turn it all around by training a young Michael Worth (who delivers a good performance) to take on Jake and exact his revenge in the ring, fist-to-fist.

It's no 'Rocky,' though it tries to be. The fight scenes are decent and shot pretty well (the foley work is laughably cheese at times). But the performances are all around solid and the music is enjoyable. Vegas made for a beautiful backdrop to the film as well.

'Final Impact' reminded me greatly of another PM classic, 'Deadly Bet.' Though, 'Deadly Bet' has slightly better action so I give that one the advantage.

If you like PM Entertainment films, or a little drama with your kickboxing, you really can't do any better than 'Final Impact.'

In all fairness, the title of this review should've been 'E.T. with a Cyborg,' but since this film is a cheap-o Italian production that even uses some of the same dub-voice actors from the 'E.T.' ripoff 'Pod People,' I figured that comparison would be more appropriate.

Regardless, that isn't to say the film is awful. It isn't. Based on the cover art and posters I saw online, I figured I was in for another bizarre Italian action flick with Frank Zagarino playing an unstoppable cyborg in the lead. However, the biggest surprise for me was that this is, in fact, NOT AN ACTION MOVIE. It's more of a light-hearted kid's film with very little action (though the violence would probably be a bit much for kids).

Basically, we have a young boy finding an escaped cyborg as he flees his government creators, and the boy decides to take him in. (The boy's dubbed voice is - I believe - the same actor/actress who voiced Tommy in 'Pod People' coincidentally.) Along with the boy's older sister, they teach the cyborg what it is to be human and help him start a new life away from corrupt government agents. Henry Silva plays the main bad guy. I loved him in 'Above the Law' so it was fun to see him in something else.

There is a bit of a shoot-em-up ending, but it's nothing special. Other than that, the film was largely forgettable. EXCEPT FOR-- The ending. I'm not going to spoil anything, but I WAS NOT expecting the ending we were given. It truly was... Well... Touching and endearing. No joke. I found myself strangely moved (and surprised) that "this type" of film could find such a sincere note to end on.

While 'Cy-Warrior' is by no means a classic, it's worth checking out if you're into the genre.