Lee Tockar credited as playing...
Max • Phillip • Pup
- Princess Crystal: [Next to the invisible wall of Santa's City in the North Pole, which is ONLY visible to "True Believers"] Close your eyes,
- [Lucinda closes her eyes, and so does Pup]
- Princess Crystal: ... and visualize. In the arctic white stands a mavelous sight, a city that glitters and glows.
- Princess Lucinda: Even the trees?
- Princess Crystal: Oh, when it snows. Inside, you'll find merry little elves humming to themselves, loading up their selves...
- Princess Lucinda: ...with toys.
- Princess Crystal: And peppermint trees with chocolate leaves lining every street. Lolipop flowers.
- Princess Lucinda: Candy-striped towers.
- Princess Crystal: And all the sweets you can eat.
- Princess Lucinda: And the chairman in charge...
- Princess Crystal: ...is jolly and large.
- Princess Lucinda: Santa! Santa Claus!
- [a brick appears in a visible wall]
- Princess Crystal: Yes.
- [Another brick appears]
- Princess Lucinda: I see it. I see it!
- [Some more bricks appear; laughs]
- Princess Lucinda: It's marvelous. It's... It's magical. It's...
- Princess Crystal: [Even more bricks rapidly appear to cover the shot] Don't stop now.
- [Crystal & Lucy gasp, followed by Pup, as the invisible wall becomes visible around Santa's City]
- Princess Crystal: Lucy, you've done it.
- Princess Lucinda: I can hardly believe it.
- [the wall simply disappears two-by-two]
- Princess Lucinda: I said "hardly."
- [the wall simply reappears two-by-two; Pup is Barking excitedly]
- Princess Crystal, Princess Lucinda: [Jumping around the enterence, repeatedly] We're here! We're here! We're here! We're here!
- Max: [Comes through the small door to the city with his flying pig aside it] Right this way, please.
- Princess Crystal: Mother!
- Princess Lucinda: Father!
- King Calvin: Lucinda!
- Queen Penelope: Crystal!
- Princess Crystal: Eugene!
- Eugene: Princess!
- Princess Lucinda: Phillip.
- Phillip: Lucy?
- [Calvin, Penelope and the rest of the crowd turn toward the Terribly Deep Thinkers]
- King Calvin: Deep Thinkers!
- [the Deep Thinkers stops and turns around toward the crowd. Agonysia drops the "Lost at Sea" document]
- Princess Lucinda: [Running away from the polar bear] Aah! It's not a man in a furry suit! It's a hungry bear in a furry suit!
- Princess Crystal, Pup: [Together and goes running away] Gasp!
- Princess Lucinda: [She trips and slides down against the nearby tree; Whimpering] Gasp!
- Polar Bear: [as he slowly goes downhill] Grrr...
- Princess Lucinda: Now see here. I am a royal penguin princess, and I command you to not eat me.
- [Lucy whimpers]
- Mrs. Claus: [to Crystal & Lucy] I'm Mrs. Claus. Welcome to the castle. We've been watching your journey on Santa's magic looking glass.
- Mrs. Claus: [to everyone] Every elf, reindeer and toy knows of your great adventure.
- Max: [to Crystal & Lucy] You even got past me - Max the Annoying Elf. Hmm.
- [Audience cheers in the background]
- Mrs. Claus: [to Crystal & Lucy] Around here, you are heroes.
- Princess Lucinda: I'm no hero. I never believed in any of this.
- King Calvin, Queen Penelope, Agonysia, Mortmottimes, Derridommis, Eugene, Phillip, The Wing Maidens, The Crowd of Royal Rookery Rock: [together] Happy hatchday to you / Happy hatchday to you / You're looking real swell / Since you shattered your shell / Happy Ha-aaa-atchday to yo-oooo-ou
- [Princesses Crystal & Lucinda and Pup the Seal head to the front door of Max Elfman's igloo; Crystal knocks door]
- Max: [Opens door] Whatever you're sellin' I ain't buying.
- Princess Crystal: We're not selling anything.
- Max: Oh. Then, get lost.
- [Shuts door; The Princesses gasp]
- Princess Crystal: We already are.
- [She knocks Max's front door again]
- Max: What?
- [Opens door as he said]
- Princess Crystal: We came all the way from the South Pole to find Santa.
- Max: Then you came for nothin'. Ain't you heard? Santy Claus, DON'T EXIST. Now scram!
- [Shuts door]
- Princess Lucinda: Can we go home now?
- Princess Crystal: He's testing us. It's part of the grand quest tradition.
- Princess Lucinda: He's certainly testing my patience.
- [Crystal knocks the door once again]
- Max: [Opens] You again?
- Princess Crystal: You're not fooling anyone Mr. Elf.
- Max: Elfman.
- Princess Crystal: [Points to Max's shoes] Perhaps you'd care to explain your shoes.
- [Camera shows Max's shoes]
- Princess Crystal: Looks like regulation elf footwear to me.
- Princess Lucinda: I thought elves had pointy ears.
- [Max covers his ears which is hidden from his hood]
- Princess Crystal: Kindly remove your hood, Mr. Elfman.
- Max: I don't wanna.
- Princess Crystal: Because you're hiding elf hears.
- Max: No. It's just a- I have a receding hairiine and I'm a little... elf-conscious.
- [Giggles]
- Princess Lucinda: I command you to remove your hood ths instant.
- Max: Make me.
- [He starts running as he takes off his hood revealing his pointy ears as Lucy grabs his hood]
- Princess Lucinda: Delighted to oblige.
- [She holds onto Max's hood for the few seconds as Pup barks then she relases it starting a chase]
- Princess Crystal: After him!
- Pup: [He and Crystal & Lucy goes chasing after Max. They go through the igloo and into the back door] Arf-ar-arf!
- [after they got out quickly Crystal remembered he goes around the left side of the igloo and continues chasing. Max get on his fat pig with a magic flying spinning cap and spins the pig's cap. They begin flying towards Santa's city. Crystal, Lucy and Pup stops chasing as they fly away]
- Princess Crystal: Oh Lucy, you said we'd find Santa when pigs fly. You're a genius.
- Princess Lucinda: True. FOLLOW THAT PIIIIG!
- Phillip: King and Queen, Deep Thinkers, ladies and gentlebirds. Brace yourselves for the comedy stylings of royal funnybird, Eugene the fool.