The Pacifier

In brief: "A bit more cutesy than "Kindergarten Cop," but more family-friendly, and Vin Diesel shows his versatility."

I don't usually attend screenings for kids' movies, but when I first found out about this film, I was very curious to see how Vin Diesel would do in a kid's film. I've liked Vin Diesel ever since "Pitch Black", and while some may dismiss him as a muscle-bound action workhorse, I've long thought that there was more to him lurking behind that facade, and remembering the skepticism that greeted Arnold Schwarzenegger's attempts at comedy—skepticism that was greeted with what I thought were successful turns in "Twins" and "Kindergarten Cop", I was curious to see how successfully Diesel would play against type.

The result is a family film more cutesy and farcical than "Kindergarten Cop", (the model my mind kept going back to for comparison), with an unfortunately greater focus on infant waste products, but greater conflict between Diesel and his young charges, which lends itself to more heartwarming moments of rapport-building.

Diesel plays Lt. Shane Wolfe, a Navy SEAL assigned to protect the five children of a top scientist (Tate Donovan), and find a hidden computer program that may be secreted in his house while their mother (Faith Ford) and Wolfe's C.O. journey to Zurich to try and find the right code word for the scientist's safety deposit box. A simple assignment, it seems, except these kids have issues. Eldest son Seth is defiant, suffers bullying from fellow students and the school's V.P., and is negligent in his wrestling team responsibilities. Oldest daughter Zoe ("American Dreams"'s Brittany Snow) is truant in her Driver's Ed class, and willfully disobedient. The problems of the youngest three, Lulu, Peter, and Tyler, seem simpler, but are no less mountainous for Wolfe, who first tries addressing these problems with the roughshod military discipline he's accustomed to, but soon finds himself changing tactics by listening to these kids' problems, and helping them out more as a parent than a military bodyguard. Whereas Schwarzenegger's character was instantly ingratiated with the object of his protection in "Kindergarten Cop" by becoming friends and eventually boyfriend to his mom, and merely had to win his class' attention, here Wolfe has the more difficult task of cutting through the layers of resentment in a pair of teenagers, taking care of an infant and two young children, and protecting them from assassins that come crashing through windows, which lends itself to both some genuinely warm moments when he opens up to Seth and Zoe, and some surprisingly interesting but funny action sequences that seem evocative of Jackie Chan, with a really nice setup-and-payoff when Wolfe realizes the secret to getting to the computer program.

This is obviously a film geared more for the kids, as evidenced by the kooky overacting, the silly Swiss stereotypes (which I didn't even realized existed), and the goofy actions on the part of the bad guys, such as the revelation, for example, that squirting a juice box into a bad guy's face is akin to spraying it with acid (and somehow keeps the bad guy from falling backward in response), but while that may be a let-down to the older folk, the parents will probably be pleased, since I recall some parents being upset with the more adult scenes in "Kindergarten Cop".

The bottom line is, bring the kids to see it, but if unless you're a die-hard Diesel fan, and want to see anything he does, it probably won't be your cup of tea if you're past grade school.

It's not rocket science, but who cares. Turn off the brain, and sit down with the kids for a good solid family comedy. Vin Diesel plays a tough guy with a big heart, he just has to find it. In the process he helps to save the world and defeat the bad guys. The children playing the Plummer family work well together, you could believe that they could be a real family (problems and all). Lauren Graham plays the principal of the school and the "love" interest for Vin Diesel very well. Their attraction is "cute" but not overdone. Brad Garrett as the vice-principal provides the off the wall character that is often presented in this script formula. His character was probably one of the main characters that could have been written better, but was passable. Pop the popcorn for a bit of a corny film and have some fun

'The Pacifier' is another clichéd kid-flick where in the beginning kids don't like the caretaker and then they all love him and what not. The reason why I watched it was because Lauren Graham was in it and I wanted to see how her pairing worked with Diesel. There was no chemistry (and I mostly blame Diesel as he's hardly ever had chemistry with any of his co-star). The film does have its few funny moments. Brad Garrett makes a few appearances and his wrestling suit was hilarious. Kids might love the film. Diesel fans might love it because he's in it. I don't. For me it's forgettable and certainly better forgotten.

Okay, sometimes I think the critics are all single "non-family" people. I just got back from viewing this movie with 7 adults and 11 children. It was wonderful to watch the kids giggle and hurrah at Vin Diesel, tough guy, nice guy, real softie routine. Whether he was kicking bad guys or changing diapers, he was great. While there were many clichés and material we've all seen in other forms, we sometime forget that this stuff works. My child is 8 and this is fresh to him. I'm so please that we were able to bring 18 people of varying ages who all had a good time. I say forget the negatives and focus on what we sometimes forget, an afternoon or evening with you kids is the best pacifier.

Okay, first this movie is great for what it is meant to be, a family friendly comedy romp. It has funny moments, touching moments, it gives you chuckles and even a few laughs. It isn't trying to win awards or stun the audience with special effects. You sit down, watch it, laugh a little, think about how cute the kids are, then go on with the rest of your day. A lot of action stars have taken a turn at comedy to soften their image, Stallone and Arnold S. to name a couple, so Vin Diesel is in good company there. I think it is a decent, light movie worth at least a matinée viewing. The kids are charmers, Vin Diesel doesn't seem to mind being the but of jokes, and most of the acting is good. And ladies, he spends most of the movie in tight t-shirts, and according to my wife has a nice posterior region. Guys you have to settle for Lauren Graham's sweet smile.