- Little Girl: Dad, will you tell me a bedtime story?
- Dad: Of course! Once upon a time, there was a man named Freddy Krueger...
- Mum: Let me do it!
- [a couple deciding on where to go on a holiday]
- Man: All right, I'll stick a pin on this map and wherever it lands, that's where we'll go.
- [sticks pin]
- Woman: Siberia.
- Man: Too cold.
- [sticks pin]
- Woman: Sahara Desert.
- Man: Okay new rule, it's got to be somewhere that can sustain human life.
- [sticks pin]
- Woman: The Indian Ocean.
- Man: Okay, it's got to be a place where we can stand on.
- [sticks pin]
- Woman: Canada.
- Man: We've been there.
- [sticks pin]
- Woman: China.
- Man: No beaches.
- [sticks pin]
- Woman: Portugal
- Man: Don't fancy it.
- [sticks pin]
- Woman: France.
- Man: Too predictable. Can I be honest? I want to go to Hawaii.
- Woman: [walks up to counter] Hello. Can I have a can of lemonade, please?
- Various Roles: [writing on a piece of paper] Over there in the fridge. Help yourself!
- Woman: And a cup of tea, please.
- Various Roles: Teabags over there, cup's there, water there, milk there!
- Woman: And a slice of cake?
- Various Roles: Eggs in the fridge, flour and sugar in the cupboard!
- Woman: [getting annoyed] And a ham sandwich, please!
- Various Roles: Pig out back, bolt gun behind door!
- Woman: I want to see the manager!
- Woman: Office there, door there!
- [Tim exits the office]
- Woman: Are you the manager?
- Man: Badge there, title there!
- Woman: [pointing at Jim] Counter there, rudeness there!
- Man: [gives Jim a termination letter] P45 there, Exit there
- Various Roles: [gives Tim an envelope] Too late! Envelope here, resignation there!
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